Hurt yourself, hurt her
by towardpages
Summary: Duchess may have a obsession with being skinny. It is not good for either her or Lizzie. Lizzie/Duchess. T for eating problems.


Duchess had a obsession with being thin. She woke up early every morning to work out, most of the days she was vegetarian if not vegan, and before she went to bed every night, she weighed herself and wrote it down in her diary. It made Lizzie worried.

What scared her the most was that she was getting thinner. Cloths were starting to hang off her as if they were on a hanger not a person. But Lizzie didn't know what to say, because she didn't know if her words would make it better for Duchess or if they would push her to the limit.

She looked over at Duchess as Kitty continued her goals of mischief for today. She was poking her fork into her salad, not taking a bit.

Lizzie picked on the bottle of dressing on the table, "Do you want some dressing Duchess?"

Duchess looked up at her. She knew that she wouldn't take it, but she wanted her to be aware that she saw what was going on. That she cared for her. That she would help her if she just asked for it. Maybe that was a little to much to ask for from a bottle of salad dressing but Lizzie didn't care. She would take any chance she could get. "Nope, I like my salad plain."

Lizzie meet Duchess's eyes. Just a few months ago, Duchess was talking about how the school's dressing was better than store brought or restaurant made dressing. How it was the best dressing in the whole kingdom, and that she was going to ask for several bottles to take home for over summer vacation.

"I don't like salad at all," Kitty said, trying to get the attention back on her. Kitty might have been a clever cat but she couldn't see what Duchess was doing or why Lizzie was giving her all the attention she was use to having.

"I think we should start getting to class," Duchess stood gracefully and glided across the castleteria to throw her tray away. She didn't even take one bit of her salad.

General Villainy was rather a small class, six students in total. One of those students was a baker, and one of those students was having eating troubles. So everyday Duchess sat in the farthest seat possible from Ginger. Nobody really thought about it at first, not until it had happening everyday.

There was a day when there were two seats left for Duchess, one in between Ginger and Raven and one in between Sparrow and Lizzie. The moment Duchess walked into the room, she saw the two seats. She sat in the one in between Sparrow and Lizzie. Raven and Ginger were closer to the door, so it would have made more sense for Duchess to sit there.

"Lizzie," Lizzie looked past her locker door to see Ginger.

"Hello Ginger," Lizzie replied.

"Does Duchess hate me," the question was blunt and straight to the point, something Lizzie usally liked.

"No, she thinks rather highly of you," Lizzie closed her locker door and started walking to class, hoping that the conversion was over.

"You don't have to lie Lizzie," Ginger was quickly nipping at the back on Lizzie's heel.

"I don't lie," Lizzie wanted the conversion to be over. She knew that Duchess didn't hate Ginger, she knew that Duchess had other reasons not to be sitting near Ginger.

"Than why doesn't she sit next to me, she avoids me like I was the Evil Queen," the furious tone was almost funny coming from Ginger, one of the sweetest girls that Holly knew.

"Why don't you ask her yourself," Lizzie huffed and Ginger was smart enough not to continue with her questions.

In that very day's class,"Duchess," Raven said, so Ginger might have been a little scared to ask Duchess herself, "Do you have a reason for not sitting next to Ginger.

Duchess looked up from her notebook, "Yes," and then she looked back down.

"Can you tell us the reason," Raven asked.

"I'm am capable of telling you the reason Raven," Duchess said.

Raven clenched her fists and closed her eyes. She let out a deep breath, "Would you tell me the reason right now."

Duchess looked up at Raven again, clearly getting tired of this little game, "I am on a diet for dance, absolutely no sugar. Our friend Ginger here wearing sugar jewelry and makes enough sweet so that she doesn't need a perfume. The sent of sugar will make me want sugar and I can't want sugar, so I can't be near Ginger."

Basically Duchess thinks that if she smells the carbs from sugar that she will gain the carbs from sugar and that she will lose everything that she had worked for.

Lizzie thinks that it has been going on for a month. Or it has least been a month since she notice it. Maybe it had gone on a little bit longer, Lizzie wasn't sure. But she was sure that it had gone on long enough. She was planning to talk to Duchess when she got back to there dorm room after ballet. But then it happen. She should have seen it coming, or something like this coming.

They were riding horse back again, something that Duchess was good at and that Lizzie was not. They were going down a simple path, one where everyone could see you. Maybe that was what pushed it to happen.

They were going in alphabetical order, so Lizzie went before Duchess. Duchess was doing great, until she got to the clearing where she was most visible at. She was trying to keep a steady face, but it was clear that something was going on with her.

"Duchess looks dizzy," Blondie was the first one to say it.

"She also looks kind of green," Apple said.

"Girls, it is great to be aware of your classmate but Duchess has never been sick in her life. She is fine," Her Majesty The White Queen said.

"Well theres a first time for everything," Lizzie left in words in the dusty. Duchess was starting to wobble back and forth. She was getting there as fast as she could, a bit of her knowing already that she wouldn't get there in time. She could faintly hear Her Majesty The White Queen go ask someone to get help. Thats when it happen.

Duchess eye's closed and she leaned towards the left side. She fells. Lizzie heard a scream. A moment later she realized that she was the one to scream. She was almost there.

She ran to the floor, and carefully picking up Duchess head. There was no blood in her white hair, which let Lizzie let out a little sigh. She pressed her head to Duchess neck, feeling her pulse. The worst thing that could have happen didn't happen. Though Duchess arm had a long gash that was bleeding, her dress and stocking were ruined, and she had dirt almost everywhere, she was alive. Duchess was very much alive.

Lizzie could feel the tears coming up in her eyes. She wanted to cry. Both of joy and of sadness. Joy, Duchess was alive. Sadness, because she could have stopped this. She could have told someone or she could have stopped Duchess. If Duchess had gotten seriously hurt, Lizzie wouldn't know what to do with herself.

She could hear her classmates and her teacher coming.

She felt a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up. Most of the time Her Majesty The White Queen had a stone cold look on her face, though she was kind. But in that moment she saw a look she hadn't seen since they had both first come to Ever After, a look of sadness. But with that sadness, there was pity. If it was pity for her or for Duchess, Lizzie didn't know.

Lizzie moved over so that Her Majesty The White Queen and the school's nurse could get a look at Duchess. But without her even knowing what she was doing, she intertwined her hand with Duchess's. She didn't even know that she was doing it until she saw Her Majesty The White Queen starring.

"You are a very good girlfriend to be so concerned so much for Duchess's well being," Her Majesty The White Queen said after she caught Lizzie's gaze.

Lizzie blinked and her mouth fell opened, "I'm not... We're not...".

Her Majesty The White Queen laughed for a moment, "I see the way you have been looking at her recently."

That's because she is my friend and she was hurting herself, Lizzie thought.

"And with the glances she gave you, I though you two must have been together," Her Majesty The White Queen was either clueless or a better matchmaker than Cupid.

Lizzie's mind seemed to shut down for a moment when she heard the words. Duchess had looked at her, friends look at friends. Yet Lizzie's heart was fluttering faster than a hummingbirds wings. Friends don't make other friends feel like this. It's not that Lizzie wouldn't do this for her others friends, like Kitty or Alistair... but she had had crushes on both when she was little. Did she like Duchess, did Duchess like her, was she clue or losing her mind.

" ," Her Majesty The White Queen spoke again, "Would you like to come with Duchess to the nurse's wing.

Lizzie nodded her head and followed her teachers. Mr. BadWolf had come when Lizzie was in her thoughts and was carrying Duchess back to the building. Lizzie toke Duchess bag though and though she knew better, she opened it as they walked. It was the basic stuff but Lizzie was looking for something specify. Her diary. She didn't know if Duchess brought her diary with her or if she kept it in her room but if she could find a way to open it she might be able to find out how much weigh Duchess had lost or why she was doing this from the start. But there was no use, no golden diary to be found.

Lizzie was aloud to sit by Duchess bed and welcome to spend the night if she didn't wake up. Lizzie looked at the clock. 3:07. She pulled out a deck of cards and the book Duchess had been wanting her to read for the last two weeks. Duchess...

Lizzie looked up at Duchess, sleeping peacefully in her bed. She looked like herself, she even had that little smile she would get when she was having a really good dream. Sometimes she would have amazing dreams and tell them to Lizzie as they went down for breakfast. She hadn't had an amazing dream in a while.

Maybe Lizzie shouldn't be here, cause as she looked at Duchess she found herself wanting to hold her, wanting to wake her up, wanting. . . to kiss her awake like in all those fairytales. Lizzie made a deal with herself, if she wakes up before sunrise I'll let myself like her and if she doesn't than I will be the best friend possible.

Lizzie found herself half sleeping and half being awake by 11:40 but she wouldn't let herself fall asleep. She wanted to be awake when Duchess woke up.

It was well past 2 in the morning when she heard some noises coming from Duchess bed. She quickly sat on the side of the bed as Duchess's eyes began to flutter. She felt her throat get tight.

"What am I-" before Duchess could finish her sentence Lizzie had lunged herself at her. Duchess didn't hug Lizzie back at first but soon enough lightly put her arms around her. The two didn't speak until Duchess felt tears hit her skin. She sat herself up a little, sitting up on the head rest. Lizzie quickly wiped her tears away.

"Your ok," she tried hard for it not to come out like a sob, she really did.

"What happened," maybe it wasn't fair for Lizzie to be keeping Duchess awake or not telling the nurse on stand that she had woken up but all Lizzie wanted was to talk to Duchess. Lizzie looked away from Duchess as she told the story, excluding the part on where Her Majesty The White Queen had called the two a couple.

"I know Duchess," Lizzie said, "I know how that happened."

"Lizzie," Duchess began.

"Why," when Lizzie looked back up at Duchess she was trying not to cry, "Do you know how much it hurt to see you doing that. Do you know how much willpower it toke for me not to tell the nurse or Her Majesty The White Queen what had been going on. Do you know what it is like for me when I see the person I care most about hurting herself."

The two just looked at each other for a while after that. "Lizzie," Duchess began again, "I didn't want to put you through that, I am sorry. I just- every time I look in the mirror I see all my flaws. I wanted to be perfect."

"Perfect isn't a real thing Duchess," Lizzie moved her hand so that it was on top of Duchess's.

"I just-," Duchess was again interrupted by Lizzie.

"I get it Duchess, but are you going to stop," Lizzie needed her to stop. She didn't want to push her, but she couldn't go on seeing what Duchess was doing to herself.

Duchess nodded her head and let it fall on Lizzie's shoulder. Maybe she should go and get the nurse but she didn't. She let herself and Duchess stay there. She let herself fall more for Duchess.

Duchess waked to her dorm room. It had been two weeks since the accident. And one week since her and Lizzie's first date. And first kiss. Duchess spun around in the hallway at the though of her and Lizzie. She really liked her. And she was planning on telling her friends about them that day. Or Lizzie's friends for that matter.

Duchess unlocked the door and saw the sight she had been expecting to see. Lizzie and her fellow Wonderlandians having a study party. They were all in a circle on the floor, with pillows, blankets, and textbooks all around them.

Duchess waved at them as she made her way over, Lizzie's eye following her as she made her way over. Lizzie was sitting on the edge of the bed, so Duchess moved to the side of the bed, Lizzie know facing her. And Duchess leaned in and gave Lizzie a kiss. Lizzie reminded Duchess of Lemon Poundcake for some reason, which Duchess just happen to adore. She gracefully slipped her tongue into Lizzie mouth and her arm around her waist.

Yep, that was definitely the sound of a teacup crashing to the floor.

She could feel all four sets of eyes on her, specifically ones that belongs to a very jealous cat. She could also heat the faint sound of pleasure coming from Lizzie.

It wasn't until someone cleared there throat that Lizzie jumped away, her whole face as red as the heart on her left eye. Duchess however smirked knowing that they would continue it later.

"Um we are trying to study here," she could hear the jealously in Kitty's tone of voice.

"And um I was just kissing my GIRLFRIEND hello," Duchess snapped back, getting up from Lizzie's bed and making her way to her own side of the dorm room. She lightly swayed her hips back and forth, feeling Lizzie's eyes glued to them.

Duchess wasn't proud of what she did but as she turned her head to look over at Lizzie, who's eyes meet hers, she was glad that something good had come out of it. Maybe the best thing to ever happen to her.


End file.
